Becoming a Resilient Person – What Do You Value?

This free MOOC course “Becoming a Resilient Person: The Science of Stress Management and Promoting Well-being” is by far one of the best resources for stress management. The course shows you to look at stress from a more holistic view: yourself, your stressors, the environment and eventually your well-being.

I think if we focus only on techniques to manage stress without paying attention to our well-being, we’re not going to tackle stress very well.

Ever since I was a teenager, I have tried gazillions of things I read from books, articles, and learn from people. They were helpful but not very effective.

Until I took a closer look at myself and tried to work from the inside.

The more effective way to deal with stress is to build a stronger you mentally and physically. Not only you can cope with current stress, you handle them better in a future situation.

You learn to become more resilient and gain“ability to strive and thrive in life.” Having resilient helps you bounce back from setbacks and failures that usually cause stress.

Setbacks, failure, and success are the results of our decisions, actions or the lack because of that, which put us in a stressful situation.

So what is the one thing you can look at today to help you reduce stress, deal with them better or make certain choices that keep you away from bad stress?

VALUES

Once I got into a serious argument with a close friend of mine. He stated that I didn’t have value. I became angry because naturally who wants to be known as someone with no value? I vehemently objected saying that I had values and plenty of them. “So what are they?” He asked. I couldn’t come up with any. “Of course I have values. I couldn’t think of them on top of my head. Who would anyway?” I said. “I need to sit down and think about the definition of values; then I’ll let you know.”

We all have value. We might live them daily even when we are not always aware of them. If I ask you right now to come up with your values, can you tell me?

Not being aware of our values or worse yet not knowing them might force us into a situation when we have to make “hard choices.”

In her TED talk about making hard choices, lawyer-turn-philosophy professor Ruth Chang says, “the hard choice you thought of was something big, something momentous, something that matters to you. Hard choices seem to be occasions for agonizing, hand-wringing, the gnashing of teeth.” IWhen experiencing agonizing, hand-wringing, the gnashing of the teeth occasions, we are under stress, lots of stress. Professor Chang goes on and explains our misconception of the choices or set of choices that we have to choose. (I’ll let you watch the talk and figure out your hard choices for yourself.)

Instead of focusing solely on the alternatives, criteria, pros and cons, advantages and disadvantages, we should include something else when we need to choose between alternatives.

We need to examine also our VALUES.

Do you know your values? Do you make decisions and take actions according to your values? Whether you’re stressful or not, clarifying your values will help you in the long-term. Sooner or later you’ll have to confront this, so why not NOW?

For starter, here are several categories of values and a list of values which helps you think and clarify yours.

Take the course for free from EdX.org and learn the rest about being resilient and stress management.